Archive for Family

Today is July 4, 2013

485646_3568799254845_1118856945_33474878_372636005_n[1]A very happy Independence Day to all of my blogging friends and neighbors.  If you have been following my blog for any length of time you have read about my Dad and his battle with cancer.

Last Friday evening, we lost a great Patriot.  My Dad passed away peacefully with my Mom by his side.  My Mom had told us that next to my Dad’s love for his family,  was his love for his country, and everything our freedoms stand for.

I distinctly remember when I was a little girl that I idolized my Dad.  He has always been my hero, now and forever more.  The pedestal I put him upon was so incredibly high, because I respected him so very much.  He was always helpful, ever so caring, and hopelessly in love with my Mom.  They were the sweetest couple ever.

My Dad was a devoted husband, father, grandfather, great-grandfather, brother, father-in-law, and son-in-law.  He never gave up on his battle with cancer, and in the end it was a complication with his liver that he did not have the strength to battle back from.  Words alone cannot properly express how extremely hard my Dad battled to keep going for the past two years.  It was an unbelievable journey for him.  Most of us would not have had the willpower or the perseverance to push forward to keep on living like he did.

In the end, my Dad was surrounded by my Mom, brother, sister, and my husband.  We were all able to say our heartfelt goodbye’s to him, including all of the grandchildren.  I will never forget the feeling walking  out  of the hospital, with my heart aching, holding my sister’s hand.  You are forever in our hearts Dad.

Today is July 3, 2013

Today my youngest son, the “baby” of the family is turning 22.  I wanted to share the post that I wrote last year for his 21st birthday.  Happy Birthday Zach! Wow!  How did this happen?  It seems like just yesterday I was in the hospital getting induced, and 28 hours later Zachary Gene came into the world.  And he came into the world with a vengeance. 10 lbs, 10 oz, and 22″ long.  He set a record at the hospital for a while.  A beautiful bouncing baby boy.  Jet black hair, a broken collar-bone, and blue, blue eyes.

Zach and I went home from the hospital on the 4th of July.  I had gone  into hospital on the 2nd,  and was determined not to be in the hospital for the holiday.  I wanted to see the family, and introduce Zach to his brother and sisters.  We’re now a family with four kids, and Zach’s name started with Z for a reason.  He was the last one.

Zach was the mellowest baby of all of my kids.  A very laid back California guy.  I remember before he went to kindergarten I had let the back of his hair grow almost to his shoulders.  He really looked like a little surfer dude then.

My sons’ had some life experiences that you wouldn’t wish on anyone.  Diabetes at age 6, leukemia at age 9, philosopher of life at age 10.  Zach’s perspective on life after SURVIVING his battle with leukemia is something that sets him apart from his siblings.  He’s thought about dying, he’s had to learn to accept his diabetes, but he’s a survivor.  A survivor that has a unique perspective on life.

Zach’s very creative; artist, photographer, singer, actor.  He pursued all of these activities in high school.  It took a little while for him to find himself, but he did.  Two of my favorite moments when Zach was a senior in high school were; watching him perform the role of Gaston in Beauty and the Beast.  Outstanding performances, unforgettable.  The second moment was when he sang Tim McGraw’s song, “Live Like you Were Dying” at a choir performance.  There was a moment when he looked directly at me.  A moment in time that I can recall in the blink of an eye.

We’ll be celebrating Zach’s birthday with family tomorrow on the 4th.  We’ve done that a lot on his birthday.  For quite a few years he thought his birthday was on the 4th, the fireworks were for him.

For this Mom, I’m celebrating the fact that my sons’ health is in good order. I’m usually reflecting on that fact around  his birthday time.  It soothes my soul to know he’s ok.  Happy Birthday to my son, I just can’t believe your 21.

Update: This post has been linked to the Grand Social linky.  Check it out!

I Miss My Housecleaner

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A little over a month ago our youngest daughter, Hilary, left the nest.  She moved out on her own, got her own place, flew the coop, and is loving her new-found independence.  We’re very proud of her getting out on her own, however it has left me in a bit of a pickle that I had not contemplated too seriously.

For quite a few years now, since everyone graduated from high school, we have had certain “twenty-something” rules and regulations that we have expected the kids to abide by while they are still living at home.

Our rules started like this-
Rule #1:  If you’re living at home and not going to school you will pay rent.
Rule #2: If you’re living at home and going to school you do not have to pay rent.  This was our incentive to be in school, working on your college degree.
Rule #3: While you are still living at home you will be expected to do weekly chores. ie- housecleaning, yard work, pool maintenance.
Rule #4 – If you have friends’ over when we are not at home – The Golden Rule is- No Police, No Fire! Period.

These were the top Four rules.  Of course we expected everyone to be respectful of each other’s space, and live life according to Rules 1,2,3 & 4.

The Rent Rule has been modified a few times over the years.  That’s a parents prerogative.  After all we pay the mortgage.  The second generation rent rule was that everyone paid rent.  It did not matter if you we’re going to school or not.  But, if you we’re going to school your rent was reduced a bit each month.   And we also give a rent credit for the monthly housecleaning skills, and landscaping skills.

As of this year,  the third generation rent rule has seen the abolishment of the rent credit completely for going to school.  But we still do offer a rent credit for your “helping out around the house” maintenance skills.  Oh,  and I should clarify this offer goes out to any of our kids still living at home only, not just anyone who needs to rent a room.

Now,  back to my housecleaning story.  The rent here could not entice Hilary to stay any longer.  She was anxious to be out on her own in the cold, cruel world.  Which meant MY days of avoiding the weekly housecleaning chores were coming to an end.  While Hilary was here doing the weekly cleaning I would usually tackle a big, deep cleaning project once or twice during the month.  This was a great routine, and it was working like a well oiled machine.

Now those days are no more.  My cleaning lady has flown the coop, and I have to resort back to the old days of cleaning the house on my own.  It’s not exactly like the olds days though.  There are only three of us living in the house now, and at one time we had seven of us here.  The bathrooms don’t get as dirty, the floors don’t get as yucky as they used to.  And, luckily I have time to spread out the cleaning during the week if I want to.  No weekend cleaning for this gal!

When the kids were all younger, and I was working full-time we would spend two hours on Saturday morning cleaning the house, and getting our chores done.  The music would be blaring, and everyone had specific chores.  In two hours we would get most everything done and call it a day.  Then we’d move on to our weekend time.

So, even though my little birdies are one by one flying out of the coop we will survive.  The housecleaning will still get done, although I will miss Hilary’s cleaning playlist.  And the bonus for us right now is our landscaper still lives at home, for the moment.  Hopefully he will give me ample notice before he plans to move out.  After all, I’ll need time to hire a gardener.

How are or did you handle your twenty-something’s living at home?

The Big Brother has Arrived

1-IMG_0048-001My grandson has a new hat to wear in his young little life.  He is now a Big Brother.  He has taken to the role quite admirably, and is learning how to entertain his baby sister and make her giggle, and laugh out loud.  Since I shared pictures of Miss Madison last week I felt it was only fitting to share the pictures I have gathered of the Big Brother and his Baby Sis.

The most delightful thing to watch is when Evan walks in the room, and Madison spots him.  Her face lights up with love and delight for her Big Brother.  And then she watches every move he is making,  just wishing she could be chasing him around the room.

It goes without saying that these two will indeed experience all of the usual brother-sister loves and hates.  But in their first year together, it has been amazing to witness the instantaneous, loving and adoring relationship that is developing.

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The center picture in the top row of this collage is the first time that Evan got to hold his baby sister.  Doesn’t he look so proud?  I just love that picture.  The rest of the pictures are simple moments that my daughter and I have captured since Miss Madison arrived last November.  I think Evan’s taken to his new hat quite well, and will be a great Big Brother!!

Happy Father’s Day, Dad

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My Dad’s baby picture. He’s ever so handsome.

This Father’s Day our family is a little scattered.  My parents are visiting family in Illinois, and Travel Man just got on a plane for Philadelphia.  So today we won’t be having the usual family get together, and that’s ok.  Times change, everyone is on the go, and life rolls on.

However, today I wanted to send some love out to my Dad, and share a few insights with you.  I was going to write a post about “Dadisms”, and make a list of things that I could remember my Dad saying growing up.  But my list became very short because there are only two meaningful “Dadisms” that will always bring my Dad to mind.

The first one was “It’s natural to be nervous”.  Remember those times when you had to make a speech in front of the class at school, or you were about to do something that took you totally out of your comfort zone?  That’s when my Dad would chime in, in his calm and caring voice, “It’s natural to be nervous”.  Those simple words would put my mind at ease, and I knew everything would be ok.

The second “Dadism” which was an endless source of entertainment for us was a famous Rodney Dangerfield line, “I get no respect.”  My Dad used this line over and over when we were in our twenties. We would gang up on him with smart alack remarks and sarcasm, especially at the family parties.  Eventually at some point during our get together we’d heard my Dad saying, “I get no respect around here.”

My Dad, he’s the family CEO, the rock of Gibraltar, and the calm in the storm.  There are so many things he’s done for our family I could be here all day making a list.  For me,  I just want him to know how big an influence he has been in all our lives.  My greatest wish is for my own sons is to be as fine a man as my Dad.

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